“Eighteen holes of match or medal play will teach you more about your foe than will eighteen years of dealing with them across a desk…”

It’s always said that you can learn a lot about someone and their psychology of life by their handshake. If you speak to a golf professional, they’ll add to that by saying that you can also learn a lot about someone by the way they play golf.

Golf coach Tim Sanders says, “The way a player approaches the game of golf is usually a good indication of the way they approach life. It’s good golf etiquette to shake hands with a player you haven’t met before, before playing a round of golf but that handshake can tell you a lot about the type of opponent they’ll be. A strong handshake is usually given by a strong character but there are some characters who always want to be on top, so much so that they’ll actually turn your hand as they shake it just to get their own hand on the top. People can come to the game with that kind of attitude but the game of golf has a way of levelling the playing field for everyone.”

“…Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent’s”

- Grantland Rice, sports writer and commentator

Patience is a virtue

Another popular saying is ‘practice makes perfect’ and it holds true in all areas of life. “If I see a new player pick up a club and start swinging fast, I can be fairly sure that they live a fast-paced life,” says Tim, “but swinging a club fast doesn’t help you to learn the game of golf any faster! If a player wants to master the game of golf, they have to be prepared to practice and putting in practice requires patience.” 

 Whether your goal in life is to master a sports skill or a business skill, there are no shortcuts. Some people are going to get to the top before others but nobody gets to the top without working their way up the necessary steps of the ladder. “The first step in golf is to learn how to hold the club,” says Tim, “but newcomers to the game are often too impatient and they just want to hit the ball. What they must understand is that being able to hit the ball, no matter how hard, is not actually going to progress them very far in their game because without a correct grip, they’ll have no control over where the ball goes.”  

 One step at a time

If you’re one of life’s ‘hard hitters,’ are you sure your actions are keeping you on target to achieving the success you want? In the game of golf, your ultimate goal is to play all eighteen holes successfully so each hole you play is effectively taking you another step closer and every shot you take counts.

 Coaches Corner:

 What’s your ultimate goal in life ?

 What represents reaching the eighteenth green in the game of life?

 Make sure every shot you play in life counts and that each one takes you one step closer to success. What can you do today that will take you closer to your goal ?

 “Life is just like a game of golf, but played on a bigger course”

- Tim Sanders, golf pro

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“Just as a sapless tree will split and decay
  So an inflexible force will meet defeat” – Tao Te Ching

Flexibility can have as much power or more as sheer force of will and determination. Think of the power of water. One of the greatest athletes of all time, Bruce Lee, used the example of water in his philosophy in life. What is more flexible and soft than water? It can flow between gaps we cannot even see. It molds itself to any situation or container, yet over many years it can carve deep canyons. Though its methods are long and we may see it as a slow and weak flowing substance, can it not crash and cause devastation, or seep into cracks and then freeze, splitting things apart?

This relates to us in ways that may not be immediately clear. Just as water may be immediately diverted from its path, so may we. That does not mean that we stop. We continue on, find the little cracks and crevices in life and flow toward our goals.

We may not take the path we originally envisioned, but as long as we keep moving forward in a positive direction, does it really matter how we get there?

P.S. I will be taking on 4 new clients for a one year intensive coaching programme starting April 1, 2010 - more details to follow. Please email me: Donald@zonedinperformance.com

I’d like to talk about leadership in a way we perhaps don’t always think of it. In order to lead, we must know how to follow.

Those born for a leadership role do not just seize the reigns of power and gallop on without an understanding of those they are leading. It doesn’t really work well that way.

As is said in the Tao Te Ching, “The river carves out the valley by flowing beneath it.
 Thereby the river is the master of the valley.”

This and many other examples are used in Taoist philosophy to demonstrate the power of the low. This power is the power of the servant of the people, the person who follows in order to lead. This is a powerful notion, and has real world application.

How can we lead people without being their servant? Is that not what a leader is? A facilitator, a communicator, a voice for a group of people – these are examples of services we provide for our team when we lead them. We act as the focal point for problems and we serve as enablers for our team members. We move obstacles so that they may do their work and shine for the entire group.

If we recognise our roles as a servants and followers of our teams and strive to make it clear to them that we exist in a leadership capacity only to make things easier for them, chances are that they will never feel threatened by that leadership.  There will be no sense of competition or oppression.

In this style of leadership you may not come to the finish line in front, gleaming with pride to take all of the glory, but your team will definitely make it there together and you’ll have more respect than if you had seized the reigns.

P.S. I will be taking on 4 new clients for a one year intensive coaching programme starting April 1, 2010 - more details to follow. Please email me: Donald@zonedinperformance.com

“The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.”
- Stephen Covey

You may know one of those people who have forged something from nothing, or you may be one of these people. Seeking their goals with a determination which is quite amazing. This could be someone in business, in sport or in any other sort of pursuit. The point is that these people seem quite amazing at first glance and our first reaction can be admiration or envy.

Let’s take a second glance. Often these people are amazing at single-mindedly pursuing one goal. This could be profit in the case of a businessperson, sometimes started because of childhood experiences or a desire to change things for their family. This could be awards, recognition, fame or other such things for a musician or an actor. It could be the next record for an athlete. The challenge with this is not the pursuit of these things. It is the imbalance the pursuit often causes.

Sometimes people often lose sight of the importance of other aspects in their lives and become so consumed with their end goal that they often damage or lose the reasons they had for starting in the first place. Forsaking family, friends, relationships. When it is all said and done, what is left when they’ve attained their goals?

The important thing is to know where your heart is, and pursue that goal in a way that is aligned with who you are and what is important to you. Never lose sight of your true reasons and don’t sell your soul regardless of the glittering prizes you may see in the distance. Your future isn’t all about wealth or fame.

It is about the sense of fulfilment you get when you practice your craft or when you’ve provided a suitable environment for your family.

It is about enjoying each moment instead of obsessing over what more you could gain.

It is about knowing when to pause and enjoy your “rich moments” rather than pursuing some future bliss, which may never come.

P.S. I will be taking on 4 new clients for a one year intensive coaching programme starting April 1, 2010 - more details to follow. Please email me: Donald@zonedinperformance.com

What is it about change that sometimes terrifies or thrills us? Is change something we should seek out or shy from, and is it a necessary part of life?

Change can terrify us when we become over attached to the idea of our current existence. We like things the way they are, so why change them? Change can also thrill us if we’re fed up with the current state of things and long for something different, new and exciting. The truth is that change just is. What change brings to us isn’t so much a reflection of its nature, but a reflection of ours.

If you’re afraid of change it is often wise to question that fear:

• Is it possible that you’re stuck in a rut and that change may refresh you, teach you new things and open up possibilities you never expected?

In the same spirit, you could attempt to address your yearning for change:

• Why are you so uncomfortable with things as they are?
• Is something deeper bothering you?
• Couldn’t your current situation teach you anything worth abiding if you’d only give it a chance?

The most important thing in dealing with change isn’t to fight our own natures or the nature of change itself. If you’re given an opportunity or see one to be taken and it speaks to that voice inside of you, then go for it. If you’re fighting too hard for a change which won’t come through for you, chances are that that in itself is something to notice.

In all things, stay true to yourself, who you are becoming and flow with change, don’t fight it.

P.S. I will be taking on 4 new clients for a one year intensive coaching programme starting April 1, 2010 - more details to follow. Please email me: Donald@zonedinperformance.com

We’ve all heard the popular words of Robert Eliot – “Rule number one is, don’t sweat the small stuff. Rule number two is, it’s all small stuff.” It would be silly to argue these words, as they ring true to most ears. Worrying about the small things will usually get you nowhere, but what about appreciating the small things?

What are some things we take for granted everyday which could benefit our lives a little more if we appreciated them more?

The key to appreciating these moments is to concentrate on them, rather than letting your mind wander onto other matters. When eating a good meal, truly savour the tastes and the company instead of worrying about the dishes to wash up after you’re done. When phoned by a friend, wonder at the conversation and the marvels which allow you to connect with that friend from a distance, instead of worrying about which bills you haven’t yet paid or how many free minutes you’ve got left on your mobile contract. If you have to walk somewhere, enjoy the colour of the sky, the song of the birds – all of the sights and sounds of the natural world or even those native to a city.

Even seemingly menial tasks can be enjoyed in this way. When washing up after a meal, enjoy the work itself. Concentrate on getting each dish sparklingly clean and on the warm soapy water instead of thinking ahead to what you’d rather be doing. You’ll probably find the whole experience much more enjoyable this way.

The key is to concentrate on the here and now and enjoy this moment, rather than focusing on what has been or what is to come. Each of these small things joins together in the chain which becomes your life, so don’t sweat the negative ones and focus on the positive ones.

When thinking to the future today, it is often tempting to imagine a utopian environment for yourself. Everything will be perfect tomorrow, or the day after, or 10 years from now, won’t it?

It can also be easy to get bogged down by worries and hidden obstacles along your path. You get caught up in the “what if” scenario, which is never a nice place to be. The truth is that we can never know what the future holds, so why box yourself in one possibility or another?

The past is gone, and we can never change it. All we have for certain in this world is the tiny, fleeting, gift of a moment which we call the present. While it is always important to look to the future, the present is where the hard work, dedication and staging area is for all of our future accomplishments.

If you let yourself get carried away with making plans that you’ll never carry out or by complicating your path with needless worry, you’ll taint the most important moment – this one. After all, if you let the present slip away, it will be lost to the past – and we know we can’t change that, don’t we?

Don’t give yourself a reason to regret this moment tomorrow. My advice to you today is to seize this moment, be bold, and do positive work for yourself now.

The future will stretch out before you, a wide and expansive path, continuing over your horizon.

Downturns can be a trying time, but the emotional tax is often not necessary. The problem with worry is that it accomplishes nothing. The key to tackling your worries is to look at the situation objectively and calmly.

Ask yourself some serious questions:

1. What am I accomplishing by worrying?
2. Can I change anything about this situation?

If you answer these questions honestly, you’ll often surprise yourself. For question 1, the answer will usually be “Nothing.” For question 2, you’ll either come up with a yes or a no. If your answer is yes and you can change your situation, then why are you worrying about it? Shouldn’t you be out there doing something rather than fretting about it? Wouldn’t affecting positive change in your life do more for you than sitting around? If your answer is no, then why worry? You can’t accomplish anything by worrying about that which you cannot influence.

History teaches us that success during recession is not impossible. The saying goes “fortune favours the bold”, and in the case of economic recession, this is especially true.

The individuals and companies who took advantage of the Great Depression did so by making bold decisions, by diversifying their interests and by being creative. They didn’t accomplish these things by worrying.

Will you Step up?

I know I’ve come across lots of people who believe that luck is the essential ingredient to success, but the truth of the matter is, it’s not!

People who say success boils down to luck typically are people who are jealous of those who achieve success.  They have this idea that luck randomly occurs willy nilly!  But that’s not the case at all!

You see, luck is far from a random thing!  We create it ourselves when we make the choice to choose success! Remember my interview with my friend Lorne Cousin and Madonna

Success is a choice!

Successful people are successful because they choose success!

They choose to be successful.

They outwardly reject anything that isn’t success, and don’t rest until success is firmly within their grasp.

When people make a choice to pursue success and persist until it is theirs, they attract into their lives situations and circumstances that will help them make that success happen.

And yes, some may call that luck.

But at the end of the day, it’s simply what happens when you decide to choose success for yourself.

The ‘luck’ doesn’t come automatically.

It comes when one consciously chooses to focus on success!

Success truly is a state of mind. Many successful people will tell you that their journey to success began when they formulated a vision and a goal in their mind.

Initially they have the idea of what they want, and then they really begin to visualize what it would be like for that idea to become a reality.

They create in their minds pictures of that success happening in their lives, and they get excited about it!

They take the time each day to think of the attainment of that goal…and they feel good about it!

This keeps them passionate about the attainment of that goal!

And in entertaining these thoughts of success attainment, those favourable scenarios, opportunities, etc, come about.

It’s when luck or magic happens!

But as you can see, it doesn’t happen randomly!  The ‘luck’ happens when we choose success.

Put it to the test for yourself today!

P.S. I will be taking on 4 new clients for a one year intensive  coaching programme starting spring 2010 more details to follow. Please email me: Donald@zonedinperformance.com

Now, let’s face it!  You’re going to have a very hard time finding anybody in the world who will say, “You know what. I don’t want success!”

At the end of the day, everybody wants success.  And it can be success in any area of your life – it’s not necessarily the desire to have loads of money or material possessions.

Success can be something like being happy with your job and having a happy, loving family.

As simple as success may be to define, the truth of the matter is, many people don’t consider themselves successful.

Many people don’t think they’re really living the life they truly want.

So why is it that these people aren’t living the life they want?  Why is it that most people aren’t successful?

It’s simple!

They just don’t want it bad enough or they settle for what they think they can have!

Too many people are quick to whinge.  They’re quick to complain.

They’re quick to get down on themselves and get down with the people they’re talking to.  They’ll blame absolutely everything for their lack of success.

But the thing is, they do nothing to achieve the success they want!

And it’s because they just don’t want it bad enough at the end of the day!

One very wise many by the name of Brian Buchner once said, “The key to success is to just want it bad enough. If you want it bad enough, you’ll figure out a way to get it.  All other factors are irrelevant.  Upbringing, IQ, genetics, environment and possessions – all don’t matter.  It comes down to drive.  If you have the fire, then you’ll get what you want, guaranteed.”

Now isn’t that something to chew over?

It’s pretty easy to really want something isn’t it?

But you have to want it enough, to be able to make the success happen.

If you want something – and I mean, really, really want it – then the circumstances, the situations and opportunities conducive to you having it, will come to you!

If we focus on the thing we really, really want, then we won’t be able to help but notice all of those great opportunities that come our way, to help us achieve the materialization of our goals.

It’s like when we meet somebody with a certain car we really like.  After we meet that person and see their car, it seems as though every second person on the road is driving one of those cars!

It’s because we focus on it!  We see things conducive to it!

If we want something bad enough, things will just happen in our lives to help us achieve it!

The key is to want the success enough, to notice the opportunities that arise and act on them!

Start really wanting the success today and I guarantee you’ll start to see results!

P.S. I will be taking on 4 new clients for a one year intensive  coaching programme starting spring 2010 more details to follow. Please email me: Donald@zonedinperformance.com