“Eighteen holes of match or medal play will teach you more about your foe than will eighteen years of dealing with them across a desk…”

It’s always said that you can learn a lot about someone and their psychology of life by their handshake. If you speak to a golf professional, they’ll add to that by saying that you can also learn a lot about someone by the way they play golf.

Golf coach Tim Sanders says, “The way a player approaches the game of golf is usually a good indication of the way they approach life. It’s good golf etiquette to shake hands with a player you haven’t met before, before playing a round of golf but that handshake can tell you a lot about the type of opponent they’ll be. A strong handshake is usually given by a strong character but there are some characters who always want to be on top, so much so that they’ll actually turn your hand as they shake it just to get their own hand on the top. People can come to the game with that kind of attitude but the game of golf has a way of levelling the playing field for everyone.”

“…Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent’s”

- Grantland Rice, sports writer and commentator

Patience is a virtue

Another popular saying is ‘practice makes perfect’ and it holds true in all areas of life. “If I see a new player pick up a club and start swinging fast, I can be fairly sure that they live a fast-paced life,” says Tim, “but swinging a club fast doesn’t help you to learn the game of golf any faster! If a player wants to master the game of golf, they have to be prepared to practice and putting in practice requires patience.” 

 Whether your goal in life is to master a sports skill or a business skill, there are no shortcuts. Some people are going to get to the top before others but nobody gets to the top without working their way up the necessary steps of the ladder. “The first step in golf is to learn how to hold the club,” says Tim, “but newcomers to the game are often too impatient and they just want to hit the ball. What they must understand is that being able to hit the ball, no matter how hard, is not actually going to progress them very far in their game because without a correct grip, they’ll have no control over where the ball goes.”  

 One step at a time

If you’re one of life’s ‘hard hitters,’ are you sure your actions are keeping you on target to achieving the success you want? In the game of golf, your ultimate goal is to play all eighteen holes successfully so each hole you play is effectively taking you another step closer and every shot you take counts.

 Coaches Corner:

 What’s your ultimate goal in life ?

 What represents reaching the eighteenth green in the game of life?

 Make sure every shot you play in life counts and that each one takes you one step closer to success. What can you do today that will take you closer to your goal ?

 “Life is just like a game of golf, but played on a bigger course”

- Tim Sanders, golf pro

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Integrity in the game of golf is such that even if no other player happened to be in view of the clump of nettles, meaning no other player would see you if you sneakily retrieved your ball, you would still take your next shot from the middle of that clump of nettles. Fishing the ball out with your club before taking your next shot would make life much easier and improve your score for your round – and, after all, no one would actually know you’d fished it out except you – but, if you want to call yourself a golfer, you’ll continue to play that shot from where it lies. If you move it, you’re cheating. In the current sports climate of mandatory drug testing for performance enhancing drugs, this mental attitude, and willingness to play the game by the rules, speaks volumes about the psychology of those who make it to the top.

“Play it as it lies is one of the fundamental dictates of golf. The other is, wear it if it clashes”

- Henry Beard

Be true to yourself

Some might say that cheating in golf, or any other sport, is only cheating if you get caught but when you play golf, you not only play against other players, you play against the course and you play against yourself. Even if no one caught you cheating by fishing your ball out of the nettles, you’d still be cheating yourself. Of course, it’s not actually against the rules to move your ball in order to make it more playable – your ball may land in the branches of a tree for example – but moving your ball must then be marked on your card as a shot taken.

Top golfers don’t get to the top by not marking their cards. The score on their card at the end of a round must always be a true reflection of their golfing ability. If they don’t like that score, they’ll get back out on the course and practice their skills until they achieve a score they like: then they’ll go back out again and see if they can improve some more. Top golfers are not content with a win over other players on a course, they are only content with a mastery of each course they play. In sports psychology terms, top golfers are motivated by mastery orientated goals: top golfers play to win but they always play against ‘old man par.’

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 So what are the benefits of being able to think quickly? Well, if you’re a Formula One driver, the main benefit is staying alive! However, for the rest of us, the main benefit of learning how to think quickly is really learning how to think clearly when the pressure is on. In sport, clear thinking is focused thinking. Learning how to focus is essentially  learning how to concentrate but crucially, focus equates to learning how to concentrate only on what matters.

 Action v Distraction

Only a few years ago, reigning world champion Jenson Button was as famous for his playboy lifestyle as he was for his Formula One success. Things have now changed. In a recent interview he said, “I thought that driving skill would be enough in Formula One, but it wasn’t…I realised that skill was not enough because everyone in Formula One is skilled – that’s why they’re here…I realised that everything else had to be on hold for as long as I was in F1.” Jenson Button has learned that physical skill alone is not enough. Staying at the top of your game takes mental skill. It takes focus: and Button’s focus is now only on winning, although he admits to not being a “saint.”

 “Your mind management has to be spot on and you must always have maximum concentration to maintain complete consistency” - Chris Buncombe

 When Lewis Hamilton was only nine-years old, he boldly introduced himself to Ron Dennis, McLaren team boss at the time, by saying, “Hi, I’m Lewis Hamilton. I won the British Championships and one day I want to be racing your cars.” The rest, as they say, is history! Unlike Button, Hamilton has not come to “realise” that success in motor racing requires focus, his focus has always been on Formula One success.

“Lewis is exceptional. He has the mind for it, the attitude, the God-given skill, but he is already recognising that he needs something else. And he is doing it with humility and style” – Jackie Stewart

Clear the Clutter

Racing drivers have only nano seconds in which to make decisions. They are under extreme physical and mental pressure when racing and the difference between a podium finish and an ‘also ran’ finish is often only the tiniest fraction of a second. There is absolutely no downtime in the cockpit of a racing car, total concentration is needed at all times. With focus and with clear thinking, decisions can be made at lightening speed. Doubts or negative thoughts of any kind are clutter, and clutter can’t be allowed to enter a racing driver’s mind. Hamilton is described as having, “an acute tactical mind, strong race-craft, and brilliant opportunism.” Button, on the other hand, is described as, “laidback but seriously competitive.” Both drivers have mental skill. Both have the ability to “see” what they have to do, and both know that their focus must always remain on what can be achieved and what can be controlled or influenced by their thoughts and actions at any given moment of time. They have no room in their mind for negative thoughts.

 Sir Stirling Moss once said of Lewis Hamilton, “It isn’t just that he is a driver, he obviously can drive – he is a racer, he can see a gap and he’s in it.” That’s NLP mental skill; that’s real quick thinking in high-speed action. Jenson Button has also demonstrated his ability to remain focused only on the elements of the race within his control by saying of less than favourable weather conditions before a race, “It’s disappointing, but we can’t stop it raining here.” So, next time you feel under pressure to make a “quick” decision, clear your mind of unnecessary clutter, learn to focus only on what matters, think like a racing driver.

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So!  You know that to make 20010 you’re amazing year, you need to decide specifically what you want, take action and pay attention to what actually works.

Then you have to keep working on those things that do work until you reach your goal.
If something you are doing is working for you…
…keep doing it!

You can also try and improve your results by making changes to that process that is working for you.  Tweak it here and there and see what happens.

If you have great results – continue doing that thing or improve the process again for even better results.

If on the other hand you get a bad result, don’t despair!  Remember Mr Edison!

Keep going and never give up!

Persistence really is KEY when it comes to achieving your goals!

You won’t get to your goal otherwise, so keep on keeping on.  Focus on the positive things that are working and give yourself rewards for that.

For instance, if your goal is to lose weight in the new year, set milestones for yourself.  And once you reach a milestone, be sure to treat yourself.

If you fall off the wagon, don’t worry! Just make sure you get back on for the next day.

What will motivate you to keep on persisting is the achievement of those mini milestones.  As great as that is though, you need to focus on the end goal.

Each day, take a few minutes to read your goals out loud to yourself.  It’s also a good idea to create a positive affirmation and read that out aloud in the morning and in the evening as well before bed time.

The affirmation should be written as though you have already achieved your goal.  For instance, “I am feeling so amazing now that I’m 10 kilos lighter!”

And when you say that affirmation out loud, feel the feelings that come with the achievement of that goal.

By doing this each day, you are staying motivated – and that will help you to stay on track.  It will help you to keep on doing those things that work, until the materialization of your goal!

Have fun with it!

Goal-setting and setting up a plan to achieve the goals shouldn’t be an arduous task.  Make it fun by following the four steps inspired by Anthony Robbins’ famous quote!

And remember this!  2010 WILL be your amazing year if you decide ASAP what you want, take action to achieve it, pay attention to what works and what doesn’t and NEVER give up until you get there!

P.S. I am starting group coaching programme for those that are wanting to make 2010 an amazing year. If you’re interested, please email info@zonedinperformance and put “group coaching” in the subject line and detail what is your “wow” goals for 2010.

Now that you understand the importance of getting specific about your goals and taking action to achieve them, it’s time to elaborate a little more on the action part.

Sometimes in the process of taking action to make our dreams happen, things don’t work well.

We may find that a particular course of action works really well, yet another course doesn’t yield results at all.

Now, this is where people can fall into a pretty significant trap – one that is detrimental to the achievement of a goal.

Many people focus too much on the stuff that doesn’t work!

Say for instance you are really passionate about your £200,000 income goal.  You get what you think is an amazing, earth-shattering idea when you are in the shower (yes – that’s where many of us get our lightbulb moment ideas!) and dry off with every bit of excitement!

You put your energy into the idea that you think can help you achieve your income goal.

But then you find that this idea doesn’t help you at all.  In fact, the idea you had is a real flop!

What do you do about it?

It’s natural to be disappointed, but given the situation there are two things you can do:

1. Be disappointed, yet get back to the task of achieving your goal by implementing other ideas; or
2. Be disappointed and get into a big depression over it…that stops you dead in your tracks!

Unfortunately, too many people do the latter.  They get so down about the outcome of a ‘failed’ idea that they just give up.  The wheels completely fall off!

If you are to actually achieve your goals, option 2 just isn’t an option.

You have to do as successful people do!

You have to pick yourself up off the ground after a disappointing outcome and say, “What went wrong?

What can I do NOW to get on track to achieving my goal?”

It all comes down to how you approach perceived (yes I’m using that word here) ‘failure’.

All of us will encounter ‘failure’ in our pursuit of goal attainment.

But it’s not so much the failure that can make us fall short of our goal – it’s our response to it.

Failure is an OPPORTUNITY for us to assess what works and what does not.  It’s an OPPORTUNITY to help us get on track.

It’s a stepping stone to success.

Imagine for a moment if that wonderful inventor of the incandescent light bulb –

Thomas Edison – gave up after the 100th attempt at getting that bulb to light up?

It took him hundreds attempts to finally make it work.

If he gave up at attempt 100, he would never have achieved success.

The reason why Edison prevailed?  He saw failure as a stepping stone to success!

He even said in his own words, “I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.”

Persistence is what will get us to our goal. And we need to focus on the things that work and not the things that don’t.  This way we will stay motivated and on track!

And that’s what you too must do in your pursuit of achievement!

P.S. I am starting group coaching programme for those that are wanting to make 2010 an amazing year. If you’re interested, please email info@zonedinperformance and put “group coaching” in the subject line and detail what is your “wow” goals for 2010.

In my last blog post where I talked about step 1 and deciding what you actually want to achieve, I introduced you to a visualization technique.

It’s a technique that will definitely help you get excited and passionate about the specific things you want to achieve in 2010.

Now that you’re excited about making all of that great stuff happen, your mind – whether you realize it or not – is already working overtime to help you achieve everything!

Your mind is LOOKING for opportunities!

When you sit down and decide what you want to achieve – then feel the excitement of achieving those goals – it’s as though you’re asking your mind to make it happen.

In your excitement, your mind gets to work on your behalf.

And that’s when you start noticing opportunities.

Allow me to give you an example.  Let’s say for instance – we’ll revert back to the goal of achieving £200,000 worth of income – you want to make that much money in 2010.

Now you may not have any idea how you’re going to do that.  But once you actively visualize that goal – and feel the feelings of achieving it – you’ll start to notice opportunities.

You’ll get ideas in your mind geared towards helping you make that money.

And when you get an idea…

…You MUST act!

You don’t want to just do nothing!  Remember, you have a very specific and very clear goal that you’re passionate about.  You want that £200,000 income in 2009, so go get it!

Your mind is already working hard to help you get it.  So when your mind gives you a great idea, chase it up!

Take action!

Go over every idea with a fine tooth comb, and pursue the opportunities that come to you!

It’s not enough to just write down what you want.  It’s not enough to go into great specifics about something you want…then do nothing about it.

If you do nothing – if you do not act – then you will not achieve your goal.

You must take action to make it happen.  No exceptions!

So keep an eye out for the opportunities that will present themselves to you.  When you stay focused on your specific goals, it is inevitable that opportunities will come to you.

The people, the places, the circumstances…it will all come to you to help you in the achievement of your goals.

So have fun with that!  Enjoy the journey!

Because 2010 is going to be a GREAT year for you!

P.S. I am starting group coaching programme for those that are wanting to make 2010 an amazing year. If you’re interested, please email info@zonedinperformance and put “group coaching” in the subject line and detail what is your “wow” goals for 2010.

Quite often in western societies, young people will set off on their gap year to travel the world and, in doing so, hope to learn more about who they really are and what makes them tick. In fact, there are plenty of people of all ages who do this once or many times throughout their life. I can remember my first trip away from Scotland, to a kibbutz in Israel! Between me buying the ticket and getting on the plane a war started. I still went, learnt a lot about myself and other cultures. I also discovered that people are not that different across the world.

Sure, a holiday or gap year can give us the opportunity to experience new things and meet new people…but as far as finding oneself goes, that can be done anywhere!

This is because finding oneself and discovering who one really is, is something that life alone will reveal to us.

It doesn’t matter where in the world we are, what our circumstances are…the desire to discover who we really are will bring about the experiences, the people and the opportunities which will help us to discover who we are.

We can learn about who we are through good and bad experiences at work, in relationships, with our health, good and with our finances.

If we truly want to discover who we are, we want to accept good and bad experiences for what they are Experiences! We take what we take from them through our judgements and perceptions. We need contrasting experiences to reveal different parts of our personalities.  The hidden crevices that otherwise would remain undiscovered, the sand in the oyster that creates the pearl.

George Moore summed it all up beautifully when he said “A man travels the world in search of what he needs and returns home to find it.”

Who we are truly is already in us, sometimes it just needs something or someone to bring it out.

Self discovery…it’ll happen anywhere at any time.  That’s what life’s all about!

P.S. I will be taking on 4 new coaching clients early in 2010 for an intensive 1 year coaching programme. Contact me directly at Donald@zonedinperformance.com if you are interested. A place on the programme is not guaranteed and I will be working with people totally committed to creating the “WOW LIFE” they desire and acting fearlessly to make their vision a reality.